Peace on Earth, Good Will Toward Men
Take a look at the Cross of Health in the top left corner of this page. Do you see Christmas there? Look close. It’s right there, the bottom anchor arm; Love and Peace. It’s there in that spot because science has proven that it is the number one most important factor in health and longevity. If you’ve heard it once you’ve heard it a thousand times – “stress kills”, and “a merry heart doeth good like a medicine”. So intuitively you know it to be true. Yet when faced with health issues such as heart disease, diabetes, cancer, etc. how often does our search for answers (let alone our physician’s) include a thorough and honest investigation of our relationships?
Is there someone in your life that has “done you wrong”? How often do you feel worried, angry, irritated, depressed, resentful, or sad? These are just some of the things we often do when people fail to act the way we believe they should. And it doesn’t have to be just one person. How about bad drivers? Or political “idiots”? Wasting vital energy on negative emotions, even for just seconds at a time, can take a devastating toll on our health.
At its heart, isn’t love and peace what Christmas is all about? What Jesus came to teach? You don’t have to be a Christian, believe in a virgin birth or substitutionary absolution, to benefit from the life and teachings of Jesus though. In fact, it is interesting to note that we actually have no record of Jesus himself ever talking about those doctrines. What He did talk about was love, most succinctly summarized in the Golden Rule, and further elaborated on in His seminal Sermon on the Mount. This notion of putting others first, of non-violent resistance to the forces of coercion and suppression in all its forms, of caring for the disenfranchised, is what the earliest Christians called The Way and what I like to refer to as the Love Paradigm. Let’s be honest, Survival of the Loving is most definitely counterintuitive. But can you imagine a world where everyone, or even a simple majority, chose to live that way? Not only would we all be healthier, but our cities would quit burning, wars would finally be a thing of the past, and social media would cease to be a cesspool of hate and vitriol. Not only would we all be healthier, but peace and goodwill on earth would finally be a reality.
Three Lifestyle Practices to Maximize Peace and Love in Your Life
If you would like a little more love and peace in your life, here are three habits worth developing that are proven to help: your own Mission Possible.
AWARENESS – The first and most vital practice for managing stress is simply being honest with ourselves. All too often we ignore our negative emotions. Sometimes burying them in addiction (food, sex, narcotics, gambling…) or aggression (active and/or passive). Other times we chose more benign socially acceptable distractions (work, entertainment, religion…). Many more times though, chronic health issues like those mentioned earlier will be your first warning of unresolved stress.
The problem is how can we admit to something we aren’t even aware of? One method that can be very effective and has been proven to have a very positive correlation to health and longevity is the practice of mindfulness. Being mindfully aware of ourselves and our surroundings is a “muscle” that in today’s society is woefully weak, but one that, just like a real muscle, can be strengthened with exercise.
Many times though we will need input from another trusted source. Cognitive behavior therapy, especially Reality Therapy, has also been proven to extend health and longevity. However, it doesn’t always have to be a professional giving the input. A good rule of thumb is to remember that there is always at least 1% of truth in any input given by someone who knows you well. Even a horse can give constructive input! It is not at all infrequent in our Horse-sense Leadership Intensives that a client will discover unresolved feelings and emotions because their horse is mirroring those same emotions back to them.
LISTENING – How often do you find your mind wandering to the next thing you want to say, assuming of course that you’ve even shut up long enough to give the other person a chance to speak? One of the most respectful and loving gifts you can give another is to truly listen to them. Listen to learn. Not to “convert” them. Not looking for an angle to persuade them with. But simply to truly understand their perspective, to wear their reality glasses for a spell.
FORGIVENESS – Another proven stress reducing love promoting habit is forgiveness. Often just the act of listening will naturally lead to a new understanding and forgiveness. But even when that does not happen, forgiving someone who has harmed us, whether they ask for it or not, will lower your blood pressure and stress levels, freeing your body to heal in ways you were totally unaware of previously. Making forgiveness a habit, accepting that life will never be “fair”, and refusing to expend energy on how others have harmed you, will free up the vital energy you need to be healthy and accomplish other important life goals.
Be warned though. Should you choose to accept this mission, you will have detractors, people who see the world differently, those stuck in the short-sighted survival of the self-protective “fittest” paradigm. Perhaps honestly, perhaps maliciously. Their attacks may be physical, they may be virtual. Either way, this will be where the rubber meets the road, where your commitment to the Love Paradigm gets tested and polished. Continue listening. Continue learning. Stay humble. Resist the urge to cast judgement. Then hold firm to your principles so long as they are grounded in love and held loose enough to allow you to release and pivot when your listening reveals they are flawed.
