I think it is pretty common knowledge that stress can cause a whole host of physical problems and
diseases, upsetting our hormonal and neurologic balance, thereby initiating multiple pathologic cascades
(including dental disease) many of which we are just beginning to understand. In fact, stress
management is now considered to be more important than even diet and exercise for disease
prevention and reversal.

Not only is unmanaged stress dangerous to both mental and physical health, but the ways many try to
live with it can be equally if not more dangerous. Over- or “comfort” eating, depression, aggression,
prescription medications, substance abuse, and tooth clenching or grinding are all too common adaptive
behaviors that only exacerbate a person’s problems.

This topic is way too expansive to cover in one little article, so right now I am going to just give a quick
overview of some of the major root causes of stress and introduce a few ways to strike at those. And
that’s a critical point that needs to be emphasized. Even most of the popular “healthy” coping behaviors
– meditation, exercise, yoga, and others – do nothing to directly address the actual sources of stress.
And as with any aspect of health – or life for that matter! – it is much more effective to deal with the
underlying cause of disease and imbalance rather than focusing just on the symptoms.

All stress can be traced back to one or more of four main sources: 1) Interpersonal Stress, 2) Money
Stress, 3) Imbalance, or 4) Faithlessness. Let’s take a quick look at those one by one.

INTERPERSONAL STRESS

When people fail to live up to our expectations, we stress. And this is always due to one of two reasons.
Either we feel controlled and manipulated by others, or we feel unable to do the controlling ourselves.
Is your boss making life difficult? You’re stressing. Spousal or family conflict? You’re stressing.
Sometime, somewhere, everyone in your life is going to behave in a way you believe is unfair,
disrespectful, or hurtful. Interpersonal issues are the number one cause of stress, and how you choose
to respond will make all the difference.

Did you notice the commonality between the two causes of interpersonal stress? CONTROL. The fact of
the matter is that the only person you can control is yourself, and the only person who can control you…
is you. The only barrier to that fact is one you erect yourself, your unwillingness to face the possible
consequences of your choice. So rather than face reality we choose to blame others. “He made me do
it.” “I’m a red head. That’s just who I am.” “No one gave me any help.” The blame game list is endless.

Is there a relationship in your life that is totally out of whack, driving you insane? The first step in
regaining your peace and sanity is to quit trying to change the other person. You can’t, so quit. Just that
one adjustment can make a huge difference! Next, take an honest look at your expectations. Are they
realistic? And in the grand scheme of things, really that important? More often than not, these are so
ingrained that it can be nearly impossible to see other possibilities. Which is why getting a truly
unbiased (not the echo chamber of your girlfriends or your golfing buddies!) second opinion can be
extremely invaluable. And finally, change your behavior to something more in line with your new
perspective.1

 

MONEY STRESS

Very few of us get through life without experiencing some sort of stress related to money. And usually,
it’s a lack of funds needed to meet our expectations. Which again brings up that need to honestly
reevaluate those. Reining in our expectations and downsizing our lifestyle to match our true cashflow
reality is always the quickest way to relieve money stress.2 That’s not to say that goals and dreams don’t
have their place. We just need to make sure to do things in the right order. Once you’ve got your budget
rebalanced, then is the time to start working on some of those dreams; figuring out how to acquire the
money needed to make them a reality.

In real life, there are four basic ways to get money.

I. JOB

For most people this may be the only honest source of income that they ever have. And if this is
your comfort zone, then the only way you are going to grow your income is going to be by making
yourself more valuable to your current or future employer. In other words, take on more
responsibility and/or expand your skill set. Often perceived as the least risky way to make money,
this is not necessarily the case, as anyone who has been fired, downsized, or hit a ceiling will attest
to.

II. SELF-EMPLOYMENT

People who don’t like being told what to do, feel a job compromises their standards, and are
comfortable with a little more risk often become self-employed. Usually, they have a hard time
delegating and end up working twice as hard to achieve their goals.

III. BUSINESS

Business owners are those who have figured out how to deliver a product or service with a system
that is able to function even when they are not present, giving them the most flexibility and control
of their destiny.

A sub-category of Business is Franchising. Over 90% of new businesses fail, mostly because the
owners never get the system figured out. Franchises provide both a proven system as well as
product thereby greatly increasing the odds of success. The problem with franchises though is that
they require huge investments, more than most employees are ever able to generate. Which is why
many have turned to Micro-franchising.

Micro-franchises allow you to acquire
the rights to both a proven product or
service, with a proven system for
delivery, at a fraction of the cost
usually required to start a business or
purchase a traditional franchise. The
trick is to find a product you can
honestly get passionate about and to
commit to the hard work required to
compensate for the low financial
start-up investment.3

IV. INVESTING

It goes without saying, investing requires having access to money you can afford to lose. This is in
part due to the huge learning curve required to become successful at it. That being said, this also
where some of the largest paydays reside!5

IMBALANCE

All human behavior, in other words everything you do, can be categorized as either Work, Play, Love, or
Worship. And too much or too little of either of these will leave you feeling stressed. In current
self-improvement and success circles, it has recently become popular to discount this traditional
wisdom. Balance is said to be an unattainable myth. While it is true that balance will not only look
different from one person to the next, and even from one phase to another in any person’s life, it is a
huge mistake to discount its importance. Just listen to Harry Chapin’s Cat’s in the Cradle again if you
need to be reminded.

FAITHLESSNESS

We live in a world increasingly dominated by fear and insecurity – STRESS! Disease, violence, economic
collapse, and environmental uncertainty have the masses clamoring for authorities to DO SOMETHING!
If you have ever wondered how the Germans could ever have submitted to Hitler, or have felt secure in
the belief that such a thing could never happen again – especially not here, take a close look at all that
has happened in the past 18 months! If nothing else it has been a stark sobering reminder of just how
easily people worldwide will submit, sacrifice freedom, and scapegoat (“cancel”) others, all on the altar
of security! As a society we have simply lost Faith, put it in the wrong places, and are seeing the results.
I believe that there are three specific reasons we have abandoned our trust in God, leaving us swimming
in this faithless pool of desperation.

I. PRESENCE OF EVIL
If God is so loving and powerful, why does He allow evil to persist? Why do bad things happen to
good people? Why would I need a God who doesn’t answer my prayers?

II. BAD THEOLOGY
Believers are fond of saying that God is love, yet much of our theology says otherwise. Love is
incompatible with being Arbitrary (i.e. can only exist in the presence of Freedom). Yet arbitrary
punishment for misbehaving and arbitrary tests of loyalty are cornerstones of much theology. It’s no
wonder so many religiosos are way too often among the most arbitrary and vengeful. “As a man
thinketh, so is he.” We become what we believe.6

III. ILLUSION OF SELF-SUFFICIENCY
From the first time we utter the words “I do myself” we humans are drawn to the myth of
self-sufficiency, revering the “self-made man”, leaving faith to those “too weak” to handle life
without a crutch. Think you’re “woke”? Not until you wake up to your own limitations and
addictions you’re not.
Unaddressed, these questions and issues inevitably lead us to lose faith in a God of Love, consequently
falling back to carrot-and-stick coercion – egocentric survival-of-the-fittest. Like a dense fog they engulf
us, preventing us from seeing the reality beyond. But finding the liberating answers is not something
that anyone can do for you. You have to want it bad enough to do the work of discovery for yourself.
And unless you do, sustainable health will continue to elude you. If you are “woke” enough to recognize
the stress that is holding you back, preventing you from having the happy healthy life you want, I’ve
provided below a list of resources to help you start to take charge and cut your stress off at the roots.

PS, ONE MORE

There is of course one more source of stress – Medical Issues. But preventing and reversing those is
really what the recurring theme of this newsletter is. In fact, that’s the whole reason we are discussing
stress.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. My two favorite books on the subject of personal choice and healing relationships are WARNING:
Psychiatry Can Be Hazardous to Your Mental Health by Dr. William Glasser and Forgive to Live by
Dr. Dick Tibbits.
2. The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey.
3. The Business of the 21
st Century by Robert Kiyosaki
4. In You Don’t Have to Be Ruthless to Win, Jonathan Keyser shows how to build any business by
constantly seeking out people to help whether or not they will ever directly benefit your
business.
5. Read Cash Flow Quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki to learn more about how to move from one money
source to another.
6. Read The God Shaped Brain by Dr. Timothy Jennnings for scientific proof of this principle and to
discover evidence that will change your whole perspective